In Washington, D.C., we are often surrounded by workaholics and Type A personalitites.  When that’s the norm, we can feel pressure to keep up. Add to the mix a weakened economy that keeps many employees edgy and technological advancements that make it far too easy to be in touch 24/7 and you can have a recipe for work-life imbalance.

First, why is it important to have balance between your work life and your personal life (spending time with family and friends and engaging in leisure activities you enjoy)?

Because you can’t have one without the other. Many of the most successful people in their chosen professions are the least happy because they have devoted nearly all of their time and energy into work and have left very little for the rest of their lives. On the flip side, those who put a lot of time and energy into their personal lives need to feel productive and that the work they do matters.

Two important questions to ask yourself to assess for imbalance:  How many hours a week do I work? How many hours a week do I spend doing social or fun activities? (A third questions might be: When was the last time I took a vacation?)

Good work-life balance doesn’t mean that you have to schedule an equal number of work hours and personal hours. And there’s no “one-size fits all” balance; what’s effective for you may not be for your friend or spouse.

But it is important that you’re not working so much that you neglect the rest of your life. There are many health, social and psychological risks attached to leading such a life. Some of the health risks:  heart attacks, strokes, ulcers and other gastrointestinal disorders, high blood pressure and weight gain/obesity.

Some of the social and psychological risks include divorce, domestic violence, depression, anxiety and increased use of alcohol.

How do I know if my work-life balance is out of whack?

There are several warning signs: bringing work home; consistently canceling social plans due to work obligations; poor sleep (including work-related dreams and teeth grinding); short temper with family members; upset stomach; tension headaches; and increased use of caffeine and/or alcohol.

So, what can I do to have a better work-life balance?

1. Set limits and boundaries with others. Give yourself permission to say ‘No’ to new assignments at work. Practice being assertive, which means being polite and respectful but firm. Remember it’s quality, not quantity that you’re after.

2. Ask for help. Contrary to what many people think, asking for help is not a sign of weakness but rather a smart and responsible way to complete a task – at home and at work.

3. Schedule social and personal time. Guard your personal time, make it sacred. To increase the likelihood of going to the gym, for example, put it into your calendar, just as you would a 9 am work meeting.

4. Plan for some fun at work and outside of work. Never eat lunch at your desk. Get out of the office and meet up with a friend instead. And plan vacations, even three-day weekends, way ahead of time. It helps to have something to look forward to, particularly in the winter months.

5. Figure out what really matters to you. Rediscover those things that once brought you joy, happiness or peace and start doing them — or find the time to do them more often. Also, differentiate between “want” and “should”. Engage in activities you really want to instead of doing things (and spending time with people) you think you “should”.

If you’d like more help creating a work-life balance, call me at 202.588.1288 or email me at david@dctalktherapy.com